At 6 months 11 days, D is cruising… for those unfamiliar with the term it prety much means we’re fucked… it means my tiny (ok not so tiny, he’s almost half my height already!) little boy is already standing up at furniture and using it as support while he tries to walk. My tiny boy who can commando crawl only and hasn’t really got up on his knees all that much has decided that crawling is for wimps and he’d like to walk already thank you very much.
Crap.
My sister got the results from her colposcopy today… it’s not good, the abnormal cells are in her glands… bear in mind that not only is this the second time she has had to go through this (the colposcopy from abnormal cells), and my other sister had full blown cervical cancer requiring chemotherapy… we are worried, it could be fine but we are so worried.
K doesn’t need this, it’s so unfair.
Think positively for her, please.
Last night we let D sleep with us and this morning I woke up to a tiny hand on my cheek and a smiley faced boy saying “Hi’.
Life is good.
Happy half birthday little miracle.
That photo post is coming, I’m just narrowing down the selection – I think D is the most photographed kid in the world
If you had told me, even a year ago that we would be using cloth nappies I would have laughed my ass off. Seriously. Both H and I are rather squeamish and right up until we dealt with the very first cloth nappy I wasn’t that sure we could do it.
I didn’t want to do cloth out of any eco-warrior type reason; I don’t much care about wastage or landfills… I sit with what is probably a large proportion of the world population – we’re the kind who will happily go along with saving our planet as long as it doesn’t take us too far out of our comfort zone, involve too much time, restrict our lifestyles or cost too much money. Don’t get me wrong, I care about our planet and I’ll happily pay extra for products that are green, organic, have less mileage etc, etc but don’t ask me to cut the length of my shower, stop buying bleach, buy a smaller car or stop going on holiday.
I didn’t want to do cloth out of any monetary reason either, yes it’s less expensive to buy cloth (if you’re sensible) and even figuring in washing costs it’s still cheaper than using disposables. There are tons of sites on the web that will happily outlay the cost of cloth vs. disposable but what they rarely include is the cost of my time in that equation and lets face it, all of us put a premium on our time and I’m more than aware that every extra load of washing I have to do means less time doing things I enjoy and it’s hard to beat the time effectiveness of disposable nappies.
I did cloth because I’m infertile. There is plenty of research on the causes of infertility and such a sharp rise in recent years has led to more than one researcher say that the chemicals used in our modern life are major causes. It is also thought that MFI specifically is linked to the use of disposable nappies. Whatever the cause of infertility, I don’t want to inflict that pain on my children and since I’m already a bit of a nutcase about eating organic and using organic, chemical free products where possible, it wasn’t that big a leap to convince myself to at least try… and as my husband (who is more squeamish than me – seriously, he wore gloves the first time he changed D) said – “if you’re already dealing with shit, how much harder can it be”.
Not much it turns out. Now when I say cloth, keep in mind I mean modern cloth – none of that terry towelling nonsense. Modern Cloth is addictive. Seriously addictive. I haven’t saved any money by using modern cloth because I buy so damn much of it. See exhibit a below – this is just the nappies that D can wear now and the photo is missing about 24 of them. See the one with D’s name on it? That one cost me $70, it’s a custom nappy made to order, it has the words Little Bear on the front and in case you can’t see the embroidery is of a mamma polar bear and her cub… $70 for something my son craps on… insane.
But oh, aren’t they beautiful?
I’m going to do a photo post of D in the next week, the password will be the same as last time – I don’t expect anyone will remember it so if you need it shoot me an email @ thenameIpostwith [at] webpage[dotcom] and I’ll get it to you, if that is all too cryptic just leave me a comment saying that you want the password and make sure you put your email in.
My irregular cycles are surprisingly regular so far post-baby. 31 days this cycle which is crazy-short for a PCOS gal like me, pre-baby the shortest cycle I had in the last 6 years was 67 days. One thing was not a surprise – no ovulation.
The arrival of AF today bought mixed feelings, anger that my body is still broken even though it seems to have learnt how to do the annoying part… and relief that I get a small break from POAS (OPK) daily, an escape from the never ending onslaught of hope killing BFN.
3 months left of this cycling without really cycling hell. At least I should be able to stop thinking that maybe my body was fixed by pregnancy like so many people have said would happen – it’s easier to accept a negative when you expect a negative.
Physically I’ve never been a high maintenance kind of girl, I don’t spend hours on my appearance and, blessed with beautiful skin, I’ve never had to slather myself with makeup. I have foundation and powder in my makeup drawer only for special occasions but usually I can get away with mascara, lip colour of some sort and occasionally some eyeliner or shadow. I have my hair cut so it takes minimum effort to style and I’m normally ready before my husband… so not even close to high maintenance but I’ve always been put together – you know, hair styled, lashes dark, lips glossed, shaved, plucked, waxed, nails filed and polished, an outfit that matches… or I used to be, lately I’m betting my husband is wishing I’d reacquaint myself with the concept of maintenance.
My hair is in desperate need of a cut, my nails cut short and left bare, I haven’t worn lip gloss in forever, more often than not I forgo mascara… and the waxing has dramatically decreased in a way that is totally unholy for someone who hates body hair as much as I do. Don’t get me wrong, I am always clean (as long as D hasn’t spit up on me yet), I shower and wash my hair daily, have my eyebrows waxed and epilady my underarms monthly but I last shaved my legs a week ago and last time I tried to epilady them I ended up with a patch on one leg done before I was distracted, more than once I’ve been out in an outfit I would normally never be caught dead in… and don’t even get me started with the state of my skin, how can skin be oily and dry at the same time? I know it’s my fault, the last time I actually did the cleanse/tone/moisturise thing was the day before D was born (so 5 months ago). Just writing that makes me feel skanky.
I catch myself in the mirror while shopping sometimes and I might be a bit daggy, sans makeup with a half falling out pony-tail, prickly legs and quite possibly with spit up on my shoulder (I gave up carrying a change of clothes for me a while back), but, I used to measure the success of my day by what I got done, now I measure my day in his smiles and who can concentrate on putting their hair up when he thinks you putting your arms over your head means that you’re going to be silly and instantly laughs?
But a balance must be struck, between my baby and my husband I have nothing left for me and it’s time I started to steal a little time back, enough to shave my legs on a regular basis, add in a brazilian once a month… oh god, how good it would feel to be smooth again, I really should look into IPL I bet it would cost a fortune to have my whole body done but if it got rid of hair for good I’d be so happy.
